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"Shock and Awe" via pixels at six

I honestly really dont know what to think. Sometimes, I feel like such an asshole whenever I talk to people about serious things, things that matter. Like my opinions condemn me for having actually learned about a pertinent topic and wanting to discuss it.

So many people tell me i'm too opinionated, I'm too smart, I'm too much. I'm confusing with my words, I'm confusing with my thoughts, they "can't handle them." Maybe my personality is just to overbearing because I actually know who I am completely. I know how to deal with me. Maybe my jump start into reality has set me apart permantently. Well, I'm sorry but I can't just be shallow. I can't accept ignorance and just tune into the millions of distractions known as American Culture. I can't tolerate and be amused with petty dramas and rediculous rumors. That's how the world got so shitty in the first place.

Maybe I'm just a freak for wanting to fix it, trying to actually think up methods to do so. Maybe that's why I'm going into journalism, to get my voice heard. Instead of having the things I say just be blown off because they're too confusing, or too deep, or too much. Maybe that'll be my downfall, maybe it'll be my strength. However, I value my intelligence too much to let it go in order for other people to be happy with me. Maybe I'll just have to wait until people open their eyes. Maybe I'm an opinionated bitch for thinking that they haven't, I suppose they could just not care. Either is undesirable... Welcome to the real world, sweet cakes ...


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 16th, 2004 09:09 am (UTC)
sometimes it's easy to feel like the white ball in a game of billiards.

i'm glad you value your intelligence. because the world around you is pretty shitty. but with a thinking mind, you'll be able to find a solution..whether it involves some sort of action against your environment...or just swapping environments. you'll be able to figure it out.
Mar. 16th, 2004 12:29 pm (UTC)
hear hear...

I really think being back in Cambridge just really makes me feel like I'm screaming amidst a bunch of deaf folk who merely discribe and define themselves through a florid array of distractions they somehow relate themselves to. Whatever though, someday I hope I can make a difference somewhere, somehow. One day... On the sunny side of the street... :)
Mar. 16th, 2004 10:12 pm (UTC)
People will be ignorant. Don't you ever dumb yourself down so others feel more comfortable. Not that you would, anyway. = )
It's like the Allegory of the Cave. The enlightened must brave the dangers of the cave known as ignorance to lead the rest of man into the light. Even though the intellictuals are constantly persecuted by the ignorant.
Lead them out of that cave. = )

Sorry. Philosophy class is getting to me...
Mar. 19th, 2004 11:01 am (UTC)
Stupid Little Anomaly...
Well... I was talking with my dad the other day and I noticed something slightly disturbing...

All the people that really incite change, the movers and shakers, the ones with convictions and dreams and plans and are actually carrying them out... well... they all get shot. I mean... look at...

Abe Lincoln
Martin Luther King

... so, it's slightly unsettling. Though, I dont put myself on near their levels but someday I hope to be... change my environment lest I become a victim thereof... but yeah. I'm gonna use this brain, dammit, even if it puts me in peril.
Mar. 19th, 2004 05:06 pm (UTC)
Re: Stupid Little Anomaly...
well... Christ wasn't shot.
Mar. 19th, 2004 09:59 pm (UTC)
Re: Stupid Little Anomaly...
no... but... crucifixion wasn't exactly a picnic either. I consider that the 36 AD method of a gun down.
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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