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i had a bad day again...

So I love my life... not really. I feel like I can't trust anything and am isolated from everything. People are such a disappointment. I want to go live in the woods, but I'm so afraid to be alone.

I feel like I can't trust anything anymore. Everyone lies to me. Tynan tells me he wants to watch the 311 video, then plays video games the whole time and acts exceptionally annoyed... Matt told me he was going to be at my house at 6, didn't show until 10:30... but, that's not any special treatment, he does that to everyone, hell he made john wait outside for a half an hour in subzero weather before he picked him up... and I should be enjoying the things he said and the stuff we did last night. He took very good care of me,held my hand, blah blah blah, yeah.. "we're in love", right? As shane says, meant for each other. Married with kids in a parallel universe... just need to bridge the gap. I just want matt to be here and prove the things he said, because my mind is killing me with what if's and bullshit.

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