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i need love, yeah...

"This is the definition of my life
Lying in bed in the sunlight
Choking on the vitamin tablet
The doctor gave in the hope of saving me."

Such a great song... found out that cody wants to end it with me too and i feel so much better now, odd thing to feel good about. Yippee! Another relationship ending!

On the other hand, an old relationship is rebuilding itself... somewhat awkwardly... but, it's all good. I've spent like... 4 days out of the last week with matt... semi-stayed at his house one night, i dont remember which. It almost makes me not want to leave... but, I miss college. I wish i could bring him with? I also wish I was a mindreader to find out if platonic is all the further we're ever going get... I can handle that, i'm down, but... there's still that little spark of hope... Tonight we're to go see Rocky Horror at the Orpheum for 5 bucks at midnight... after meeting up with shane and annie... we're trying to hook them up..i wish someone would try to hook me up with that matt kid... but, it may very well be a useless attempt depending on him. I'm not thinking he wants to risk breaking the comfort bubble he's assembled over me... which i guess is for the better as I don't think now is the time nor the place, with me being in college and him being here. I'd still like to fall asleep with him again... and maybe even kiss him, just once. Nothing more than wishful thinking though...Tomorrow we're going to watch requiem for a dream... and go to state street, or maybe state street is monday... i dont remember... everything is just a big 'ol blur.

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