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Your assistance is required.

Okay. So I need your help.

I have this absolutely batshit assignment for work. I'm supposed to write 300-500 words on what is in store for McCain if/when he loses the upcoming election.

For the life of me, I can't think of anything other than 1) will remain a Senator until 2010, 2) remain on the two senate committees he currently sits on, 3) retire or die.

I don't know how in all of God's green goodness I'm going to write more than 3 sentences, so I have decided to go the Onion route. Let's rabbit-hole this bitch!

So please, don your Lewis Carol hats and tell me what you'd like to see McCain do after this election. Perhaps he will become the first geriatric superhero. Maybe he will meet -- and perhaps eat -- the muffin man. He could subsist solely on spam and daisies. No idea is too absurd.

Please, let me have it. I'm dying here.

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Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
nerdish
Oct. 19th, 2008 06:36 am (UTC)
Mr. Mccain and the legendary big foot (who really has thyroid problems, and his feet are swollen and doesn't deserve the rude nicknames.) venture off to the land of Nod in search for the mystical last unicorn. When they find her they have toast and ...unicorn jam.

I dont' know. Sounds difficult. I wish you luck
blyssfulchaos
Oct. 19th, 2008 02:25 pm (UTC)
i'd like to believe that the enormous growth on his face will turn out to be his long lost twin finally surfacing after all these years. also, he will play an old version of quagmire from family guy in a live version of family guy.
distress_bacon
Oct. 19th, 2008 05:43 pm (UTC)
What about the talk-show and guest-speaker circuit? Going into infomercials? Being one of those demonstration guys they have in the expo tent at the county fair (ShamWOW!)? Secretarial work? Lake Havasu harbormaster! There's always work as a pornographic cameraman...
1great_escape
Oct. 20th, 2008 01:15 am (UTC)
He's going to encounter the muffin man, and the muffin man is going to eat HIM.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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