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Proof Positive

Avril Lavigne needs to stop making music right. now.

And this is why.

Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend" single off her new album, The Best Damn Thing.


Let's examine this, shall we?
  1. This is not socially acceptable behavior. This is exactly why women don't trust other women. You can thank Avril for this stunning portrayal of why some girls get ridiculously posessive and jealous. Some selfish, snotty, "princess", pretty-girl decided she wanted what what wasn't available and actively went to sabotage someone else. Oh, and this what we're marketing as cool to the wee ones? What about the girlfriend, eh? What about "do unto others?" If I sound cranky, it's because this has happened to me before, and it sucks a lot. Maybe I'm an old fuddy-duddy, but boy-poaching is most emphatically not okay. Taken means taken, regardless of whether you like their better-half or not.
  2. Actually, Avril, you couldn't be anyone's girlfriend since you - oh, I don't know - got married. Unless Deryck is okay with that sort of thing, which... even then, is also not socially acceptable behavior.
  3. This is still not punk! I don't care how many times you dye your hair black, wear spikes and a plaid skirt, walk around with a skateboard, drop a few choice four-letters, and jump around while singing. This music is not, and it never will be, punk music. This is irritating, repetitive, Mean Girls music and it's about as shallow as a kiddie pool. Avril, do not sully one of my favorite music genres with your vapid presence and misnomers!
  4. Avril, you are not a Pussy Cat Doll. Do not try to mix "Dance" genre moves with whatever it is you are doing. I don't think I've seen anything more disturbing than Avril wearing fishnets, bloomers, bubble-pink in her preppy blonde hair, while the camera zooms in and out of her crotch. Also, she has a dance posse? Since when? Since when does she dance? Wasn't she supposed to be like, the anti-diva?
  5. This song has been done before. It was called "Don't Cha," but that song had a modicum of respect for the other woman. "You got to play fair." This means no tripping, shoving, or kissing the boyfriend in front of the girlfriend.
  6. P.S. Avril, you still can't sing. Lest I forget that important part. I know it worked for Britney, but... well, you can see where she's ended up so let's not go down that road, mmmk?


Seriously, y'all. And you wonder why I hate pop music. I would rather listen to Sanjaya. All that boy needs is some stage training and he'd be good to go.

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Comments

( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
rhapsody
Apr. 19th, 2007 05:34 pm (UTC)
What I don't get is if she's punk why is she singing the chorus like a cheerleader.
virtuistic
Apr. 19th, 2007 05:42 pm (UTC)
No kidding. Her little arm movements syncronized with her little posse of whoeverthehell. Like I said man, vapid. Vapid vapid vapid.

P.S. A punk would never say "She's like, so whatever." Liek duh, zomgz.
notashamed
Apr. 19th, 2007 06:11 pm (UTC)
I agree with most everything (especially 1, 2 and 3) but...

I DON'T CARE. I LIKE THIS SONG. :D MWA HAHAHAHAHAHA
virtuistic
Apr. 19th, 2007 07:36 pm (UTC)
THAT MAKES YOU A HORRIBLE PERSON. JUST SO YOU KNOW. :P
notashamed
Apr. 19th, 2007 07:52 pm (UTC)
I'M TOTALLY OK WITH THAT.
notashamed
Apr. 19th, 2007 07:53 pm (UTC)
BUT HOLY GOD THAT'S GOT TO BE THE UGLIEST WEBSITE I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.
virtuistic
Apr. 19th, 2007 07:54 pm (UTC)
I TOLD YOU SHE IS TEH EV0L.
bottledglory
Apr. 19th, 2007 09:29 pm (UTC)
It's one catchy mutha fucker I'll give it that. :\ But it also came out when my ex started dating someone and this reminds me of me slightly.... minus the whole I SUCK AT LIFE message it conveys
d0rkyc0rky
Apr. 19th, 2007 10:39 pm (UTC)
Wow. I didn't know that song existed. Now the text that my boyfriend got from his ex girlfriend like 2 days ago completely makes sense. Yeah, the one that he still hasn't erased.

WOW. I am so pissed off.

PS - I've hated Avril since sk8r boi. Ug.
muhnipul8a
Apr. 20th, 2007 04:16 am (UTC)
only 6?
aaskie
Apr. 20th, 2007 12:07 pm (UTC)
THANK YOU. I used to like Avril because of 'I'm with you'.

Now? After this song? And the vid?

Arrghhhh...
promiseoftin
Apr. 21st, 2007 01:25 am (UTC)
I love (to hate) this song. Honest and for serious.

But I agree with you on the whole being married thing. Like, shouldn't she have gotten over singing songs like this before puberty hit?

I would love to see someone write a feminist manifesto in like, Hypathia, or something about the dichotomy that Avril's image and material displays.
halieee
Apr. 24th, 2007 09:51 pm (UTC)
She's so much prettier with black hair. And why are they dressed alike? That's gross.
I could almost understand if they did something to villify the girlfriend, like make her all crazy possessive and nagging, but they didn't. She's just preppy. She's being punished for not being "punk."
And yes, I much prefer "Don't Cha" because of the line "if it's not love it just ain't enough to leave a happy home." And the fact Avril is married really bugs me with this song.
bullet4fob
Apr. 26th, 2007 03:25 pm (UTC)
oh come on, you know she's the motherfucking princess.
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )

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