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I am not getting any of my comment notifications, and I am not happy. Is this happening to anyone else? What gives? I know El Jay went through some maintenance, but they say it's all done and things should be normal. I note that things are definitely not normal.

However, in keeping with the Monday norm, I'm skipping lecture to catch up on all the homework I didn't do over the weekend. Nevertheless, there are worse ways to spend a Monday. Tea, sofa, and book seem pretty exciting actually.

D'you know what else is exciting? Paris Hilton wants to be an astronaut! I'm not even joking. Read the article. Oh, did I ever have a laugh at that one. Pure comedy. She's taking the simple life into ... rural Pennsylvania outer space. 'Cause that's what people with simple lives do. They leave planet earth. Seriously though, more power to her. Maybe it'll give her some direction in life, because the next thing I'm about to talk about needs some serious direction. Hence, the next installment of the 'Oh, whatever' segment.

Oh, whatever.
Paris Hilton has reverted from full-on sex-tapes into adolescent fantasy. It's bullshit, and it's creeping me out.

For some reason, I just don't believe a 25-year-old heiress should (or would, for that matter) be rolling around in her underwear on a teenage boy's bed, and she definitely shouldn't be cooing in his ear. I also really have difficulty believing that she would come down from on high and save her adolescent neighbor from being a social pariah at his high school.

Ah yes. Paris Hilton, saving innocents from loserdom & swirlies one high school at a time.

Oh, and if she caught said neighbor boy watching her change clothes, I'm pretty there would be no coy waving through the window. She'd have her body guards in his room, stealin' all his posters. It would go straight from chihuahua love into restraining order. A mi, c'est l'amour.

FURTHERMORE, THESE LYRICS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE CONTENT OF THE SONG. What the hell? What's the point? Who writes these lyrics and why are they always fraught with meaningless cliches? Why has someone not taken away their writing utensils? Who thought this video premise would be a good idea and why are they not fired? And why, for the love of God, can't we get Paris to move in a way that doesn't scream "bored model/wannabe pole dancer"? For realz. I hated Britney, but at least she tried to create interesting music and "danced." Paris just murmurs over a monotonous 4-chord bubble melody with a Casio keyboard beat, cocks her hip out in front of a wind machine, and falls all over a male (regardless of age, clearly.) Whatever.

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( 15 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 6th, 2006 05:56 pm (UTC)
Paris Hilton wants to be an astronaut!

But what if they schedule her for an EVA? Her boosters might mess up and shoot her in the wrong direction, away from the shuttle. They'd have to let her float away because to divert from the orbit would cost too much fuel and endanger the entire crew. As Spock tried to teach us in Star Trek, the good of the many outweighs the good of the one, so there'd be no rescuing. Sure we'd have to listen to three months worth of "news" broadcasts about her sacrifice, but at least we'd be free. Free!!!!

Nov. 7th, 2006 03:13 am (UTC)
It'll never happen, and here's why:

"Wait, you mean I have to poop in my suit?!?! DEAL'S OFF."
Nov. 6th, 2006 05:57 pm (UTC)
i am physically ill and i watched a grand total of 35 seconds of that video.
Nov. 7th, 2006 03:14 am (UTC)
Paris Hilton, making normal people wretch since 2003.
Nov. 6th, 2006 06:05 pm (UTC)
Nov. 7th, 2006 03:15 am (UTC)
rofl, I love your icon. That is amazing.

Also, I totally agree.
Nov. 7th, 2006 03:23 am (UTC)
JD is the shit.
Nov. 6th, 2006 07:41 pm (UTC)
Ahh your video commentary makes me LOL. I kind of dig the song, but the video is just a lame version of The Girl Next Door.

And astronaut? I just don't see that happening.
Nov. 7th, 2006 03:17 am (UTC)
I never saw that. =/

And I know, right? She clearly has no idea what it takes to be an astronaut. Unless she's packin' an Aerospace degree under all that blonde hair and Aquanet... it won't be happening.
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 7th, 2006 03:06 am (UTC)
Then give me your notes instead of scolding me for opting to try to get some work done on my IDL course that is due in 13 days instead of going to a lecture that is normally pointless.

The midterm is next week. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
Nov. 7th, 2006 03:11 am (UTC)
Sorry for being a bitch, but I feel guilty enough about my current academic performance. I don't need anyone else reminding me that I should be going to class. I'm good enough at beating myself up.

This is really not a good time for me.
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 8th, 2006 02:03 am (UTC)
Dude, you totally read my mind! I was gonna fix myself a cocktail and lounge in some jasmine bubbles.

In hindsight, I realized that. I'm just ... a little testy lately and I apologize, I do. How's your white model coming?
Nov. 7th, 2006 01:20 am (UTC)
Duh duh. Duh duh duh duh duh.

So what? She can't get males within 10 years of her now? She's going for twelve year olds?

But seriously, the rip off of "The Boy Nex Door" pisses me off because I (secretly) love this movie.
Nov. 7th, 2006 05:54 pm (UTC)
HAHAHA If it was a grown ass man in a little girls room...it would be a horrid crime against nature eh? Funny how stuff like that works. :o
Nov. 7th, 2006 05:55 pm (UTC)
( 15 comments — Leave a comment )

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