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Interest Drabble Challenge 018/150

Well, I'm skipping my Chronicles of Narnia interest, because I just can’t fic it. Instead, I’m opting for a different CH favorite of mine that hasn’t quite made it onto the list of interests, but I think it's my best drabble yet.

Chuck Norris Facts

1. Chuck Norris won’t stop the world and melt with you, but he will stop the world and watch you melt.
2. Chuck Norris doesn’t feel pain. He delivers pain.
3. God was going to smite Sodom and Gomorra himself, but he was too tired, so he sent Chuck Norris instead.
4. Chuck Norris doesn’t donate blood, he delivers it bulk after draining his victims.
5. Contrary to historical documentation, Chuck Norris is responsible for the Trail of Tears.
6. The sun ain’t yellow, it’s Chuck Norris.
7. How many roads must a man walk down before he is round-house kicked in the face by Chuck Norris?

HEE!

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Comments

( 17 comments — Leave a comment )
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 04:25 am (UTC)
Okay, that is just plain awesome.
virtuistic
Jul. 20th, 2006 04:29 am (UTC)
Hee! XD
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 04:33 am (UTC)
I am starting to see what you mean about the interests being awfully restrictive, though. Most of mine... I can find so little to say about. Oh well, bah, I do not mean to whine, this was my baby and by God I will tackle it. In any case, I have plenty of fndom-based interests left, it should be easy enough to work with those.
virtuistic
Jul. 20th, 2006 04:58 am (UTC)
Yeah, this is why I'm going alphabetically, because otherwise I don't think I'd ever tackle the ones that I have little or nothing to say about.
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:01 am (UTC)
I tried, but was just so SPECTACULARLY uninspired by my first, like, three interests that I started to skip about randomly.
virtuistic
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:02 am (UTC)
I'm going to be severely behind because I'm going on vacation here in a few days, and I am not going to post 5 a day.
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:05 am (UTC)
Understood. *shrugs* Ah well. I'm just impressed this has gone as organized as it has so far.
virtuistic
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:06 am (UTC)
hey do you want to come on AIM quick?
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:16 am (UTC)
Alas, there is no AIM on the computer I'm on. Um, if you want to chat off LJ, you could email me?
virtuistic
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:17 am (UTC)
No it's alright, I'm going to head to bed. My internet connection is being sketchy tonight anyway.
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:18 am (UTC)
Okay. Some other time, then. *glomp-hugs* Sleep well, and all that stuff.
virtuistic
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:19 am (UTC)
*smish* You too! hXc ENG!
mattador
Jul. 20th, 2006 05:20 am (UTC)
Represent!
nini_darko
Jul. 20th, 2006 04:44 am (UTC)
okay, the funny thing is that yesterday a coworker walked in and said a chuck norris fact: chuck norris doesn't have to do anything for a klondike bar.
then as if it was normal every day talk, we all through in our own. it was so unplanned, and had my supervisor dying laughing at us. my contribution was: chuck norris walks into a funhouse and breaks every mirror. why? because there can only be ONE chuck norris.


just had to throw that in.
(Deleted comment)
virtuistic
Jul. 21st, 2006 01:11 am (UTC)
I work, doood! :( But we might give you a ringaling later tonight or tomorrow mo'nin.
(Deleted comment)
virtuistic
Jul. 21st, 2006 04:09 pm (UTC)
Bah! More warning! More "staying"!

How was the show, by the way?
(Anonymous)
Jul. 22nd, 2006 09:10 am (UTC)
From The Desk Of The V.B
The quickest way to a man's heart...is with Chuck Norriss' fist.
There is no theory of evolution...Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris could eat a Rubik's Cube and shit it out solved.
Chuck Norris is so hard he clogs the toilet every time--even when he pisses....
( 17 comments — Leave a comment )

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