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It's a very, very mad world.

How the fuck to people manage to live past 25? It seems to me like getting to 21 should be some form of noted accomplishment. Everyone seems to be dropping like flies. Today a freshman jumped out of the 9th story of Middlebrook Hall. At 11:20 I heard the sirens, didn't think anything of it. Miah and I woke up around noon, were joking around, talking about the fucking weather and then I get the news update and feel like I'm going to choke for the rest of the day. It's so fucking tragic. So young, right on a goddamn holiday, and such a bad way to go. Seriously. What. the. FUCK! I want answers, and I'll never fucking get them.

Needless to say, this break started out on the wrong foot. However, I'm going to try to make the best of it. I've already been an asshole, though. I didn't call Britney or Dangerfield, and I miss them both so much. I need to get ahold of Shane and Annie too really badly. Not to mention I have a fucking 10 page paper to write and I couldn't pick up the rough draft and get feedback on it because I couldn't get out of the fucking dorm because of the aforementioned incident, which means I also couldn't turn in Faith's paper for her, couldn't meet with my Journalism adviser, and almost missed my fucking bus home. God, I want to scream myself hoarse.

The only thing that's good about today was the food at Red Lobster, and the conversation with Matt. A lot of venting on both sides, more from him than I but that doesn't really matter. I think it really helped him to get it all out too, because he was laughing and jovial afterward which makes me feel better. I can go to sleep on a positive note, at least. I love that kid, I do.

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
aither_nyx
Nov. 27th, 2004 06:18 am (UTC)
GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT!!!!
I really wish the tragedies would just stop. I can't take this anymore. Why is it that being this age is so hard? So hard that people don't think they can get through it? I don't know what to do anymore. I'm still sad about someone I knew, that I'll never get to see again, and now this. I'm sad for someone I didn't even know, don't even know his name. But I care anyway. Why can't we help the people we love? Why can't they come to us and realize that they have a lot to live for? No one is really as alone as they feel, but how do you convince them of that? Now I'm just really worried about everyone I know. It seems that being this age is a hazard. If it could happen to someone who never seemed sad, what about my friends who are depressed all the time? I just want it to stop. I want everyone to be happy.
virtuistic
Nov. 27th, 2004 08:07 am (UTC)
Re: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT!!!!
We all do Sandy, but you can take it. That's why the rest of us are here for you.

It's not the age that's hard, I don't think. But it's impossible to know why, the questions will remain unanswered and that's the unfortunate truth. The only one question that I can answer for you is "why can't we help the people we love?" You can't help someone that doesn't want it. If they don't think they need it, or they're convinced it wont help, it's no fault of yours or anyone else's. The only thing you can do is offer a helping hand, an open ear, and a warm heart. The rest is up to them. If there's one thing I've learned it's that you can't make up or change someone else's mind for them, no matter how hard you try, and even if it's a matter of life and death. I can assure you though, you don't have to worry about me. After all, dying is kinda... y'know, forbidden in my department. ;) Cheer up as much as you can, I owe you a hug when I get back up there.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )

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